PHD Rears Its Glorious Head

I am pleased to announce that I have stayed true to my pledge to repress my Christmas compulsion and my family's 15 massive boxes of Christmas decor remain safely tucked away in my attic. Similarly, I have exhibited immense willpower with regard to shopping for Christmas decor and/or gifts, and purchased nothing. Although I will confess, I did have a weak moment a week and a half ago and began the design work and initial construction on a mitten and tree garland for my children's playroom, BUT used materials I already had on hand. And then, today, I walked through the doors of my local Target.
I realized this afternoon that Halloween is tomorrow...Friday...and 1 big bag of candy from Costco is not going to be nearly enough. After unsuccessfully navigating the parking lot version of Frogger at Costco, I decided to pop into my favorite one-stop-shop, Target, for a couple bags of candy. As I walked to the back corner of the store, I sensed something different. Was that....Could it be...YES! The faint strains of Christmas music playing in the background. I started walking faster until I rounded the corner and there it was: Five halfway completed aisles of Target Christmasy delights. My mood was instantly lifted and I wandered in a happy haze through those five aisles for a solid 15 minutes. What's new? What's different? What are their design themes going to be this year? Did I purchase anything? No! Did I want to? Absolutely YES!
I couldn't help smiling as I slowly wandered away from the Christmas aisles, on to my more urgent candy buying task...I even found myself merrily humming a Christmas tune. Three hours later I still feel cheerful and a little giddy inside, with visions of sugarplums dancing in my head. And I ask you, is that so bad?

No More Granola For Me, Thank You.

Have you heard the one about the nicely dressed woman who got the evil eye from the granolas at Trader Joe's? No? Allow me to share.
This is how bizarre my existence is. I've shared previously how much I love the area that I live in. It's beautiful, just the right size, and there is very little traffic. It is also, how shall I say...a little earthy. And you know what? For the most part that doesn't bother me. I merrily go about my business, happy to be attired in the clean preppy clothing that is my preference, a smile on my face, and my Chanel sunglasses perched atop my head. I don't comment on or disparage the dreadlocked, hemp-wearing, or slightly odorous folks I frequently come in contact with in the downtown core of our community. I'm sure they're lovely people on the inside, and are merely in a phase in which personal appearance and/or hygiene is not at the top of their list of priorities. In the 16 years I've called this gorgeous place my home, I have, however, come to the realization that if I am planning to spend time downtown, say, grocery shopping, it might be more enjoyable if I downplayed the glam.

So, the other day I decide I need to journey into 'the big city' to search for a few ingredients the grocery stores in my little cow town just don't have. I'm planning to peruse the Co-op and Trader Joe's. I love the Co-op, they have great stuff there, but as I don't generally roll up on a bicycle pulling a trailer behind me with my organic cotton-clad off-spring nestled inside, I honestly feel like I don't get the best reception from the other shoppers. Not to worry, my plan is to hit Trader Joe's first and then the Co-op as a last resort. I take a quick inventory of my appearance before exiting the car: Clogs - check; Natural fiber, chunky knit cardigan - check; Basic make-up, no sparkly lip gloss - check! I'm all set!
The doors to Trader Joe's slide open and I'm assaulted by the smell of exotic flowers and...wait, is that wet dog? No, no, just one of my more earthy fellow citizens. I found what I was looking for very quickly (Israeli couscous, thank you), but I did have a strange experience. You see, I never expected that my earth-first, all natural, organic brethren would resort to guerilla shopping tactics. It was as though it was 8 am on the first day of the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale, and the doors had just opened. Uh huh, that's right, it was showdown time between me and the freshman from Western who was busy sowing her earthy oats. The objective: The last box of Pumpkin Bread & Muffin mix. The result: Victory, for me. And the evil eye from a hemp clad, petulant, patchouli-laced young woman, who stalked off muttering something rude about yuppies. I couldn't believe it.
I concluded my shopping trip after the Trader Joe's experience, grateful that I had found everything I needed on my list, and certain that I'd had my share of granola for one day.

Table for One, Please

Two afternoons each week, I have four uninterrupted hours of child-free grown up time while my little darlings enjoy an afternoon at preschool. To top that off, the school my children attend is just far enough away from our home that journeying back after dropping them off is not the most convenient thing to do and, frankly, a tremendous waste of time and fuel. So, for the past few months I have taken advantage of this time by scheduling various appointments, grocery shopping, and just catching my breath - by myself. It's been wonderful. Silly me, I also assumed that it would be a great time to catch up with my girlfriends, many of whom are also domestic goddesses with small children. Small children who don't attend school the same days and times as my small children. Result: I don't actually see my friends any more than I did prior to preschool, although, any phone conversations we have are blessed with far less background noise on my end.
Now, I make a valiant effort at using my time wisely during these four hour chunks, but even the most dedicated meal-planner can only spend so much time at the grocery store. And who would have thought that you could actually get tired of wandering the aisles at Target, alone, with no tiny voices pleading for pretzels, water, or a bathroom break? Certainly not me, but alas, it's happened. So, now what? I'm alone, too far away from home to drive back and watch the latest DVR'd episode of Mad Men, and, (confession time) pretty much terrified of going into a restaurant or coffee shop by myself. I know it's ridiculous, but that's the truth. I've always felt that way and have always been embarrassed by it, so then my anxiety is doubled - I'm too nervous to go in and annoyed by my nervousness. I decided to tackle my issues by starting off small: a coffee here and there, then ordering a coffee and sitting down with a book or magazine. Feeling like I'd conquered the coffee shop, I decided the other day to have lunch by myself. Knowing that given the chance I'd over analyze the entire situation and wind up starving and sitting pathetically in my car, I pulled into the nearest restaurant, grabbed my book, and headed in for lunch.
Things are proceeding well; no one gave me any weird looks as I was seated and there were several other people dining by themselves. Okay, this is great! I order, take my time enjoying lunch and my book, and, really, am feeling pretty fabulous about the whole situation! Wow! I can really do this without turning twelve shades of red and feeling like a complete idiot! WooHoo! All until this: "Excuse me, MAM, are you...," and then I tuned out. And turned twelve shades of red. Oh no she di-n't. "Mam?" "MAM!?" REALLY?! Am I that old that I need to be addressed as 'Mam'?
So, I keep reevaluating my place in life as compared to the last time I did anything by myself, which was four years ago, before my little guys were here. Four years ago, I was still a twenty-something woman...and now, I'm not. According to one doctor, I'm now 'middle-aged' and, by the way, you can suck it, Dr. Gilbert, for that stunning revelation. But here's the thing, if being 'middle-aged' means being comfortable with who you are, then I'll take it. The twenty-something me still cared if the grown-up versions of the mean girls from high school liked me. The twenty-something me worried about a lot of things that don't need to be worried about. The woman I am now doesn't worry about those same things, at least not as much. I'm grateful for the twenty-something experience, and know that that time contributed a great deal to the path I'm now privleged to travel. Maybe my thirties will teach me how to enjoy time in a restaurant by myself. The point is, for the most part I know who I am and I feel good about it. No compromises, no excuses. No energy to be anything different! But, please, don't call me 'Mam.'

The Gray Period

Fall has certainly arrived here in the Pacific Northwest! For those of you who have never experienced the changing seasons here in Washington and Oregon may I just say: We get a lot of gray in autumn and winter. Gray skies, gray lakes and rivers, gray roads, even the trees turn a sort of muted gray without their leaves. It becomes a bit overwhelming.
A friend in Portland recently asked if I had any suggestions about plants that would provide a little splash of color during the Gray Period. As a matter of fact, I do! I have used most of the plants below in containers on the steps of my south facing front entryway and they have weathered through fall and winter (including subfreezing temps and snowfall) surprisingly well. There are a few details, though, that we should cover before looking at the plants. First, make sure you've put new, good soil into your pots before planting for fall. Do not use the old, root-bound soil from spring and summer. Next, be thoughtful about the location of your containers during the fall and winter. Make sure they are somewhat sheltered, while not completely in the dark. Finally, it is worth it to take a visit to your local nursery (as opposed to a box store, like Fred Meyer) for these plants, especially if your green thumb has only just sprouted.

This is Fountain Grass. I've heard the color described as red or purple. It is spectacular. The feathery plumes provide texture and visual interest to a container garden, not to mention height - this plant gets to be about 24 - 30 inches tall. Even after the plumes have dried out and the color has faded, I think Fountain Grass is still beautiful. To the best of my knowledge, this is not a perennial but it's been worth the price for a solid six months of enjoyment. Use this as a centerpiece and starting point for designing your pot.

This is Crimson Curls Heuchera (coral bells). There are a wide variety of Heuchera available in fall toned burgundy and purples. The ruffly, curly leaves paired with the elegant flowering stems also add textural interest to your container or perennial bed. This is one of my favorite perennials and I use it frequently in pots and beds. Remember, when you're adding plants to garden beds to use the rule of odds: plant in odd numbers for best overall effect.


A common, and favorite, plant to use in the fall and winter is Flowering Kale. Flowering Kale comes in a variety of shapes and color combinations. I prefer the 'Pigeon' variety on the left that resembles a flowering head of cabbage. You can also find this same shape with the center in a pretty pinkish purple, or a combination of ivory and purple.

Another great species of plant to use for the fall is Sedum. These plants are great because of the succulent-like leaves and the splash of deep color that their flowers bring. The variety pictured here, Autumn Joy, may not be great in a container because of its height and the fact that it will need to be trimmed back, but there are such a wide variety of Sedums you're bound to find something fabulous for garden bed or pot. Look for a trailing variety with dark purple leaves and bright magenta flowers.

I've saved the best for last! Winter Pansies, also called Ice Pansies. These little guys are spectacular for adding bright color to a dreary gray day. They are specifically bred to survive in cold, wet weather and to bloom at the exact opposite times your summer flowering pansies do. The flowers tend to be smaller, on a scale with violas, and will happily bloom throughout the coldest fall and winter weeks. The flowers should be picked back before going to seed so that they continue to bloom. They will rest for a little while late in the winter, but will amaze you by blooming again right around April. Don't confuse these with regular pansies sold at your grocer or big box store during the fall, they are not the same.

Just say, "No!" to Premature Holiday Decorating (PHD)

After yesterday's post, I have taken to heart my issues with PHD. I will not ignore the effort I put into decorating for Halloween, five weeks ago. So, I submit to you the following photos:

Look at this gorgeous beast! It's my favorite of all the pumpkins we harvested (um, purchased) this year. I love the skin's texture and the particular shade of orange is fantastic. This big guy came from Boxx Berry Farm in Ferndale, WA.

I'm a huge fan of white pumkins. I love their sturdy elegance and when carved and lit, they are stunning. Again, these pumpkins and the lonely gord were harvested at Boxx Berry Farm, in Ferndale, WA.

Christmas in October

I woke up in the middle of the night ready to decorate for Christmas. Yes, I realize that it's only October 13th, but you see in my home we (and by "we", I mean me) are consumed with holiday decorating. If you're familiar with my Facebook page, you may recall the *&@$%! Halloween light fiasco of September 9th and September 10th. And, yes, you just had the same reaction as most of my Facebook Friends...why on earth was I decorating for Halloween in early September? I can't help it. I'm obsessed and it's a problem on many different levels. Problem #1: It's the barely the middle of October, and I'm mentally decorating for Christmas. What about Halloween? And don't even mention Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving has the potential to be one of the most meaningful holidays for my children in terms of teaching gratitude and recognizing the blessings of a good harvest. Last year, we didn't even prepare the requisite meal. I couldn't! Too busy decorating the fourth Christmas tree...go away and leave me alone - order a pizza if you're hungry! Problem #2: No matter how satisfied I am with the previous year's holiday decor, no matter how much I tell myself, "Finally, I'm done. I won't have to buy a single decoration for next year!" the truth of the matter is that I'm a big fat liar. How could you not buy a little prize for yourself? Really, it's not even for you - it's for the greater good and enjoyment of your whole family. Uh huh, yes, and, um, for all of your holiday visitors. It doesn't matter that you live two hours away from your nearest relative and that your best friend lives in Florida. It's like Field of Dreams...if you build it, they will come.
Okay, this is just silly. I have a whole house decorated for the autumnal holidays and at least two and a half weeks left to further embellish on the Halloween vibe. I pledge to attempt to curb my Christmas compulsion and allow myself to enjoy the entire fall holiday season before frantically ripping down anything that happens to be a shade of orange and replacing it with something from my fifteen massive boxes of Christmas decor.

Where have all the fabulous shoes gone?

I had a rude awakening today. Some might call it an epiphany, but no, I assure you it was, in fact, a rude awakening. Get ready for it: My shoe rack has taken a dramatic turn away from fashionable and fabulous footwear to comfort shoes. As I stared, horror struck, at the rows of Dansko clogs and Privo mary janes, I couldn't help but wonder, "Where have all the fabulous shoes gone?" When did I turn the corner from "fantastic" to "comfortable, yet supportive?" As I crammed my post-pregnancy size 7.5's into a delicious pair of 6.5 animal print ballet flats with a darling quilted patent leather toe, I was forced to seriously take stock of my most recent personal style decisions. I'm not sure I like what I see. You see, I still take pride in my appearance - even though I'm bound to have some child-created gunk on me somewhere...lurking. I'm still the 'go-to gal' for my girlfriends and their personal style choices. I love fashion magazines and snarl loudly at anyone who tries to commandeer the latest Nordstrom catalog before I've completed my requisite quality time with it. But, it dawned on me that I had actually ventured out in public wearing trainers, that's right people, sneakers, the previous two days...and not done anything particularly athletic whilst wearing them. This is a problem. You see, I didn't even own a pair of sweatpants until I left my full time corporate job four years ago to fulfill my dream of being a full time mom. My family and my dream are now a reality, but my closet is home to at least half a dozen velour track suits and my shoe rack...well, we've already covered that. It's time to devote some serious thought to this awakening - join me while I open a bottle of Cabernet and indulge in a piece of 85% cocoa dark chocolate...wait, hmmmm....maybe there's another problem? :)